Another joyful Jubilee! celebration

Another enlivening and evocative celebration at Jubilee! Community this Sunday morning. And as always, the opportunity for profound connection with lot of folks. Some highlights from Minister of Ritual Howard Hanger, others who made the magic possible as well as YouTube versions of some of the songs we sang. May peace be with all of y’all! Oh, yeah!

From Howard’s meditation on risky business

“There’s no such thing as security in this life, sweetheart; and the sooner you accept that fact, the better off you’ll be. The person who strives for security will never be free. The person who believes that she’s found security will never reach paradise. What she mistakes for security is purgatory. You know what purgatory is, Gwendolyn? It’s the waiting room, it’s the lobby. Not only does she have the wrong libretto, she’s stuck in the lobby where she can’t see the show.” –Tom Robbins, Half Asleep in Frog Pajamas

“A good talking to” by Donna Glee Williams and Tebbe Davis

What should you care about, NOW?  Is it really the car you drive, with all the bells and whistles?  Keeping the grass mowed and the edges trimmed? The latest hand-bags, sensible pumps, hair, nails, wide-screen, cellphone? Toys, toys, and more toys?

[ . . . ]

But you need to hear the message from people you love, mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers and your best friends.  They have to remind you of what matters, and you have got to hear the lesson . . . or else.

Wo-Ya-Ya

we are going, heaven knows where we are going,
we’ll know we’re there
we will get there, heaven knows how we will get there,
we know we will

Stand by me

When the storms of life are raging, stand by me

What a Wonderful World

Ripple

“What is to give light must endure burning.” –Victor Frankl

Sunday, June 28th, 2009

This is the week that was

So, how was your week? Below is some random stuff from my past few days—from simply choosing happiness, to decision making about the financial crisis, to the evolving definition of marriage, to an exploration of my little city of Asheville.

Choosing happiness
An excerpt from a book I’m finishing up. The working title: Be Happy Now!

There’s nothing you have to do. You want to be happy? Be happy.

–Neale Donald Walsch

Your happiness is not dependent on what’s happening out there; it depends on what’s happening inside you. It’s not a matter of chance; it’s a matter of choice. Believe it or not, you can be happy whenever you really choose to do so.

Sure, you’ve had challenges in your life. Of course, there are things taking place in the world that you wish were different. Yes, your loved ones didn’t always treat you as you wanted to be treated. And you can wallow in self pity and play victim, if you like. Or you can put your focus on what’s great about your life and make a conscious choice to be happy. It’s entirely up to you.

So lighten up. And at the beginning of each day set an intention to be happy: “Today I will be happy and focus on the good stuff life brings my way.”

An alternative take on the financial bailout
How are decisions about fixing the financial crisis really being made in Washington? This video from South Park explains it in full. LOL!

Updated definition of marriage
Same sex marriages are now included Merriam-Webster Online Dictionary’s definition of marriage. See 1 [a] (2) below:

1 [a] (1) the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law (2) the state of being united to a person of the same sex in a relationship like that of a traditional marriage [b] the mutual relation of married persons [c] the institution whereby individuals are joined in a marriage
2: an act of marrying or the rite by which the married status is effected ; especially : the wedding ceremony and attendant festivities or formalities
3: an intimate or close union

Asheville is a melting pot
From the Richmond Times Dispatch, an article about the eclectic and hospitable little city of Asheville.

The drummer sounds the first thumping beats, steady and thick in the cool night air.
After several moments, a second offers a tentative melody, gaining confidence from the approving cheers of the gathered crowd.

The toddlers and barefoot teens are the first to start moving — bouncing and swaying and twirling with abandon.

A third and a fourth drummer join the growing tempest, now a fifth and sixth, building to a rhythmic crescendo. Suddenly, the staccato peal of a tom-tom breaks through the din. A goateed sexagenarian raps his cowbell, and a long-haired man in a black beret crouches around his drum, inches away from the audience like a washed-up rock star.

The crowd is alive now, a pulsing mass heaving along with the frenetic pace of the drummers. Dancers sway and swoop, arms akimbo and heads bowed, their eyes closed as the sound washes over them and echoes back from the darkening stone walls.

This is the Friday night Drum Circle, and this is Asheville, a city that makes no apologies for its nontraditional flair, that embraces the bohemian and yet welcomes outsiders like a long-lost friend.

Click here for a video of the drum circle.

Click here to read the entire article.

Saturday, March 28th, 2009

CBS News Poll: Americans Optimistic About Next Four Years

Perhaps America is not really composed of red states or blue states, but of United States. From CBS Campaign ‘08 Horserace:

Whether they voted for him or not, Americans are optimistic about the next four years with Barack Obama as president, according to a new CBS News poll. Seventy-one percent of all Americans say they are optimistic about the next four years, including nearly half (48 percent) of all those who voted for John McCain. Just 17 percent of all Americans are pessimistic, including 40 percent of McCain voters.

Eighty-three percent of African-Americans are optimistic and 88 percent of Americans under the age of 30 are as well. While 88 percent of Democrats say they are optimistic, so do 51 percent of Republicans.

Though we are in challenging times, I think these polling results bode well for our nation.

Tuesday, November 11th, 2008

Spending time in the natural world–a sure cure for what ails you

Depressed? Of course we’re all depressed. We’ve been so quickly, violently, and irreconcilably plucked from nature, from physical labor, from kinship and village mentality, from every natural and primordial antidepressant. The further society “progresses,” the grander the scale of imbalance. Just as fluoride is put in water to prevent dental cavities, we’ll soon find government mandating Prozac in our water to prevent mental cavities.

—M. Robin D’Antan

Going to the mountains is going home.

—John Muir

The best remedy for those who are afraid, lonely or unhappy is to go outside, somewhere where they can be quiet, alone with the heavens, nature and God. Because only then does one feel that all is as it should be and that God wishes to see people happy, amidst the simple beauty of nature.

—Anne Frank

***

In these times, many of us spend very little time in the natural world and, thus, suffer from what some call nature deficit disorder. We tend to move from one human-made structure to another human-made structure, from one air-conditioned space to another. This is a radical departure from the way humans lived for tens of thousands of years, and it’s not without its consequences.

We need our time in nature to feel the rhythms of the seasons. We need it to let go of the overly-domesticated part of ourselves and remember who we really are. We need it be among the wildlife and to recall that we too are animals with our place in the web of life. We need it to retain our sense of wonder and awe.

To be happy, spend time outdoors as frequently as possible, at least for a few minutes each day. Then once a week, go into the wilderness for a few hours to commune quietly with nature. Check your happiness thermostat afterwards and see how it’s risen.

Saturday, June 14th, 2008

Blessing my past and letting it go

How I became accountable for my past, released myself from my transgressions and embraced the here and now

Without freedom from the past, there is no freedom at all, because the mind is never new, fresh, innocent.

The time is now, the place is here. Stay in the present. You can do nothing to change the past, and the future will never come exactly as you plan or hope for.

The past is finished. There is nothing to be gained by going over it. Whatever it gave us in the experiences it brought us was something we had to know.

After decades of denial, a few years ago it became clear to me that I had some unfinished business from my past to clean up with friends, acquaintances, relatives, former business associates, past romantic partners and even perfect strangers. For out of my own unconscious fears and beliefs about life/humanity/myself, I had often treated others disrespectfully, dishonestly, irresponsibly and unlovingly.

So I sat down to make my list of those with whom I wished to make amends. This list turned out to be six typed pages and included the names as well as the transgressions I’d committed from the 1950s to through the 2000s: an opponent I’d purposefully tried to injure in a high school football game; a college chum about whom I’d spread hurtful rumors; friends who I’d betrayed by engaging in dalliances with their wives and girlfriends; folks with whom I’d failed to fulfill outstanding financial obligations; customers whose trust I’d abused. This list was painful to look at, some of my actions were difficult to acknowledge.

A time for atonement
My plan was to contact each of these individuals to apologize for my actions and to ask for forgiveness. And I made a good start: I asked for and received forgiveness from a friend whose girlfriend I’d wooed away; I got closure on an auto deal never consummated with a friend in high school; I reconciled differences with someone I’d tried to throttle during a city league basketball game. But the enormity of the task proved to be too intimidating, and I got bogged down almost immediately each time I began.

Even though I now have a commitment to treat others with love and respect and clean up lapses in this commitment as I go, I knew that carrying around the remorse, guilt, shame and self-judgment about events of the past was a burden that must be released. For if my focus is on the past, how can I be passionately present in the moment? If I’m looking backward, how can I put my energy on my purpose and intentions for the here and now? If I’m burdened with regret, how can I tame the accuser in my mind and live joyfully? If I have not confronted and become accountable for my past, how can I claim to be a man of love, compassion and integrity? If I judge myself harshly, how can I be gentle and forgiving with others?

The wisdom of the runes
When I drew runes below a few weeks ago, I realized the time had come to lighten my load. Runes, by the way, are small stones on which symbols are inscribed that serve as an oracle from which one seeks advice on making decisions. Runes are drawn one by one from a small pouch, and the meaning each is then determined with the aid of an accompanying book.

On this particular autumn day, I was at a gathering at which the four of us present wished to gain clarity on our paths and how we might best proceed. Each of us drew three runes: the first rune provided the overview of our current situation, the second was the challenge and the third was the action. The runes I drew were:

• Gateway (Thurisaz): Stand at the gateway, review your past, bless it and let it go. Then step through the gateway.
• The Unknowable (Blank): Relinquish belief that you’re in control and leap into the unknown.
• Disruption (Hagalaz): Events beyond your control create radical disruption in your life, but your inner strength provides support and guidance at a time when everything you’ve taken for granted is being challenged.

Though I typically regard practices such as this with some skepticism, my three runes fit perfectly. After drawing the Gateway rune, however, it became clear to me that I would not carry my excess baggage with me into 2008. So on December 31, 2007, I looked over my list, added a few additional names and began the process of blessing my past and letting it go.

Seeking forgiveness
I contemplated each name, brought the face of that person into my consciousness, replayed the transgression in my mind and, in some instances, experienced how each of them might have felt in the face of my insensitivity. Finally, I told them that I was truly sorry for what I had done, and I asked for forgiveness. Miraculously, I had a sense that this forgiveness had already been given.

At the end of the process, I expanded my call for forgiveness to everyone who might have found themselves in the path of my thoughtless or hurtful behavior. And I reaffirmed my intention to be loving and respectful toward all humans, all living things and the Earth itself. I trusted that everyone who needed to hear my message would receive it at an energetic level and some might get it through reading this blog post.

Blessing the past
So after taking full responsibility for my behavior and its consequences, after making amends in my own way, it’s time for me to forgive myself. And I do so right here, right now. Not that I don’t understand that my past experiences have helped make me who I am today. For if I had not been so asleep, I might not have been ready to be awakened. If I had not felt the sting of hurting those who loved me, I might not have so fully valued my connection with them. If I had not finally sunk so low in my esteem for myself and others, I might not have seen that the only way to go was up.

Yes, I lived on the dark side—drinking, drugging, brawling, lusting, loathing, lashing out. And out of those experiences, I have come to know the truth of who I really am and how to live from that truth. And with the personal consciousness, wisdom and intuition I now acknowledge, I realize I have the power to bless my past, aware that it was an essential part of my path, and to let it go, ready now to step boldly into the unknown, into whatever Life has in store for me.

Note: If you are one toward whom I have behaved unlovingly, I take full responsibility for my actions and make no excuses. I am deeply sorry for any pain or suffering that you might have felt and hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me. You can count on me henceforth to treat you as I myself would wish to be treated. Furthermore, I invite you to share your thoughts and feelings about these matters if that is something you wish to do.

Tuesday, January 1st, 2008

Serenity now! Focusing on what I want

During my absence from blogging the last half of September, a couple of things have taken place:

1. I have completed an initial draft of my next book with the working title Be Happy Now. The draft currently consists of 70+ short readings regarding actions one can take to become more happy.
2. I have taken what I’ve written in Be Happy Now to heart. Sometimes you teach what you most need to learn. I can’t say I’ve put it all into practice yet, but I have the intention to do so.

First a couple of excerpts from Be Happy Now. Please keep in mind that this is an initial draft and these readings could be revised substantially, be merged with others or be eliminated entirely.

Serenity now! Serenity now! Serenity now!

–Frank Costanza

Whatever way we observe the world around us is what comes back to us, and the reason why my life, for instance, is so lacking in joy and happiness and fulfillment is because my focus is lacking in those same things exactly.

–Miceal Ledwith

Focus on what you want more of
What do you want more of in your life? Abundance? Intimacy? Wisdom? Spirituality? Love? Happiness? Do you typically focus on what you want more of? Or do you focus on what you don’t have?

When you put your attention on what you want, you tend to attract more of that into your life. When you declare, “I want more friends in my life,” you’re broadcasting your desire to the universe, and you energetically become attractive to people who might become your friends. When you proclaim, “I don’t have any real friends,” you broadcast that to the universe and tend to push away those who might be open to friendship.

Each day spend 10 minutes visualizing just one thing that you want, imagine yourself already having it, then live like it’s a reality. Do this for 30 days and see what happens in your life.

* * *

Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.

–Nelson Mandela

Never does the human soul appear so strong as when it forgoes revenge, and dares forgive an injury.

–E.H. Chapin

We must develop and maintain the capacity for forgiveness. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies. Forgiveness is not an occasional act; it is a permanent attitude.

–Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Release your resentments and forgive
Resentment is a poison that pollutes your body, mind and spirit. It not only disconnects you from the person toward whom you are resentful; resentment toward anyone blocks you from connecting deeply with your closest loved ones. And it prevents you from connecting with that best part of yourself.

Refusing to hold ill will against another is just good sense. For who is suffering from the resentment you hold? It’s not the intended recipient, it’s you! As long as you hold ill will toward the “perpetrator,” you are playing the victim, making your happiness contingent on what someone else did or didn’t do. Take back your power by completing the process below.

Make a list of all of those toward whom you have resentments and the resentments you hold (from not putting the cap on the toothpaste to being passed over for a promotion at work to an illicit affair). Don’t lie to yourself and pretend you have none. Next bring each person, one by one, into your consciousness Then release the resentments toward each and forgive him/her for all past transgressions. Finally bring your own image into your consciousness, release the resentments you have toward yourself and forgive that precious person too.

By forgiving for good—yourself and others—you feel a profound lightness, a deep sense of relief and a greater awareness of your personal authority. Having cleaned out this malevolent emotional baggage, you’ve made more room for truly being happy.

Focusing on what I want has been especially challenging when it comes to many of the present politicians in Washington, D.C. The current administration and others have done an excellent job of demonstrating what many of us don’t want in national leaders. But if I focus on saying “No, no, hell, no” to these politicians, Republicans and Democrats alike, I am giving more energy to what I don’t want. And I’m not putting my focus and power toward what I do want.

There are plenty of political pundits, blogs and websites that do an excellent job of letting us know when the emperor has no clothes. My favorite blog for local issues is Scrutiny Hooligans, especially Gordon Smith’s posts. My favorite blog for state issues is BlueNC. And my favorite national progressive news website is Cursor.org. For commentary, I recommend Arthur Silber’s Once Upon a Time. I suggest that you give them a visit.

My intention is to focus the creation of a community, nation and world that is more compassionate, just, peaceful and sustainable. And to do so, I know I must let go of the resentment that I’ve been holding toward our president, vice president and others in their administration. It seems that the poison I’ve been drinking has had no effect whatsoever on them, and it’s had a corrosive effect on me, my peace of mind and my happiness.

This is my path. And just so you know, I’m not there yet. But I’m definitely headed in that direction.

Friday, October 5th, 2007