As I’ve worked on my memoir, what’s become a massive act of self-interrogation, I’ve realized that my disconcerting experiences during the first grade that I've described above profoundly [...]
Realizing that Shonnie’s graduate studies at Western Carolina University were about to resume and Gracelyn would soon begin online classes at Evergreen Community Charter School, we began planning [...]
Most of my teachers have faded into a nameless, faceless blur. However, there was one savior in the midst of my 12-year confinement. Ms. Mitchell came to Bel-Aire Elementary (Tullahoma, [...]
"Finding My Way Back Home" recounts my journey from toxic masculinity to a more mindful manhood, a voyage that includes participating in a transformational workshop, peeling back the encrusted [...]
"A Tale of Two Daughters" is the story of how, and why, I slipped the surly bonds of toxic masculinity and transformed from emotionally-stunted misogynist to awakened advocate of equality, from [...]
Evergreen Community Charter School is currently taking significant steps toward becoming a more diverse, equitable, and inclusive community.
Thank you for the huge role you've played in our lives, Howard. Thank you for keeping the main thing the main thing. Thank you for being you.
Yes, I'm excited today because my personal essay "With over 40 years between the birth of my two daughters, I am two different fathers" is featured at the Washington Post On Parenting section.
Well, they didn’t pry it out of my cold, dead hands. But my only remaining firearm has just left the premises.
Today I write this letter to you so that you might better understand the tumultuous transformation that’s currently underway in our nation.
It was Saturday, and that meant pizza and homemade ice cream night at the Lavender-Mulkey home. And, as frequently happens, it was time for a family dance.
I wrote this on December 31, 2010 and am reposting it in honor my daughter Gracelyn’s 6th birthday today. * * * “What is your purpose in life?” the guardian of the gate at the men’s retreat [...]
Here’s a commentary about violence in our nation that I wrote for the Asheville Citizen-Times late in 1999 that seems unfortunately appropriate for these times. [...]
My great-grandmother, Mae McCarthy (better known as Ma), who enjoyed dipping snuff and preferred another layer of body powder to regular bathing, had a Victorian attitude when it came to [...]
While living by myself in a little cottage on Mount Bonnell outside Austin in the early nineties, I was without a significant other for the first extended period in my life. Fortunately (though I [...]
Loved this song in 1970 when my daughter Lilla was two, and I love it now as my daughter Gracelyn is about to turn five. “Teach Your Children Well” by Crosby, Still, Nash and Young [...]
“What is your purpose in life?” the guardian of the gate at the men’s retreat demanded. “To work toward a more compassionate, just and sustainable world,” I immediately replied. “You may enter!” [...]
Our parenting choices have been made with discernment and purposefulness with the intention that Gracelyn remain authentic, powerful, creative, self-sufficient, grounded, happy, healthy and [...]
We didn’t tell her what to think, Or any rules to follow. We didn’t tell her what to feel, Or how to anger swallow. We couldn’t teach her to be real, And not to feign emotion. We wouldn’t tell [...]
This video brought tears to my eyes. It’s about Mindful Parenting as taught by Dr. Shefali Tsabary, a powerful philosophy through which parents learn to create deep transformations in their [...]
Everyone’s heard the old saying “You don’t know your ass from a hole in the ground.” Well, when we were kids, one of the ringleaders of our gang would say to one of our [...]
Here is a list of the 20 books that have had the greatest influence on me.
The Wit & Wisdom of Gracelyn by Bruce Mulkey & Shonnie Lavender | Make Your Own Book
it’s 3:23 in the morning and I’m awake because my great great grandchildren won’t let me sleep my great great grandchildren ask me in dreams what did you do while the planet was plundered? what [...]
Each day at our evening meal, Shonnie, Gracelyn and I participate in a ritual that provides an opportunity for each of us to say at least one thing that happened that day for which we are [...]
Tonight while listening to music at the Lavender-Mulkey homestead. Gracelyn: Let’s dance! Me & Shonnie: OK! (The two of us adults slow dance facing each other with Gracelyn lying on her [...]
The day Mr. Rogers saved public television. I wrote “Mr. Rogers offered kids genuine acceptance and a unique model of manhood” shortly after his death in 2003.
Gracelyn and I made and enjoyed yummy homemade popsicles today–lots of nutritious ingredients with no added sugar. Later I found myself thinking that she probably got more essential [...]
There could never be a father who loved his daughter more than I love you. H/T to Mike Miller for telling me about this song.
“I didn’t think old people could have babies.” That’s what my 13-year-old granddaughter Molly said when her mom (my daughter) Lilla told her that Shonnie was pregnant. When Lilla explained that [...]
In a world in which men are seen as superheroes, testosterone-poisoned oafs, new-age sissies or simply clowns, Fred was the embodiment of a different image: a man who used his immense talent and [...]
