Shifting cultural paradigm

A little over a week ago, I got an intimate view of tenacity and courage from seven bold women, including my wife Shonnie Lavender and our friend Elizabeth Likis. On March 13, Republican Rep. [...]

Loving, sensitive, trusting, and curious when I entered life in 1943, at around five years of age, in reaction to the disparaging remarks and denigrating actions by the mostly well-meaning adults [...]

One evening a week or so ago, Shonnie, Gracelyn and I watched “Dead Poets Society” together. At the film’s conclusion, I began to ponder the course of my formal education—from the first grade [...]

Shonnie, Gracelyn, and I held hands and watched intently as President Biden repeated the final words of the oath of office: “I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of [...]

2020 has undoubtedly been a year of tremendous challenges. The COVID-19 pandemic resulting in more than 340,000 deaths so far, a severe economic downturn, and disruption of our daily lives. The [...]

The 2020 general election is upon us and could prove to be the most important election in the history of the U.S., an opportunity to uphold our democratic values and stop the slide toward [...]

You may have seen that meme that was going around social media a week or two ago: “Dear 2020, none of this sh*t was on my vision board.” Well, life so far in 2020 has presented a number of [...]

"Finding My Way Back Home" recounts my journey from toxic masculinity to a more mindful manhood, a voyage that includes participating in a transformational workshop, peeling back the encrusted [...]

Evergreen Community Charter School is currently taking significant steps toward becoming a more diverse, equitable, and inclusive community.

Yes, I'm excited today because my personal essay "With over 40 years between the birth of my two daughters, I am two different fathers" is featured at the Washington Post On Parenting section.

Well, they didn’t pry it out of my cold, dead hands. But my only remaining firearm has just left the premises.

We popped into French Broad Food Co-op during the Women's March in Asheville on Saturday for a few snacks and something to drink. And as I wandered the aisles, I thought, maybe it's time to re-up [...]

Today I write this letter to you so that you might better understand the tumultuous transformation that’s currently underway in our nation.

I believe we, the citizens of this nation, have been asleep for the past several decades. We began to pay more attention to our TV shows, our favorite celebrities, our sports teams, our fancy [...]

I am a recovering racist. I grew up white in the South of the 50s and 60s. Most of the schools I attended were segregated. And I have rarely had more than superficial contact with men and women [...]

Brighten up your day with this poignant ad from 84 Lumber. Better bring some tissues.

An essay I wrote during the Bush administration in 2003 that's highly relevant today.

The first presidential inauguration I attended was Richard Nixon’s in 1969. Well, I guess I should say that I was actually there for the counter-inauguration . . .

On a warm Texas morning on Wednesday, November 3, 1948, I remember my mom, Sue Mulkey, a life-long Democrat, gleefully asking our next-door neighbor, “Well, how do you like our new president?” [...]

For your viewing pleasure on International Day of Peace.

In 1958, during my sophomore year at Tullahoma (TN) High School, all the boys in every class were ordered to the gymnasium bleachers with the male teachers for a sex education talk by a local [...]

Here’s a commentary about violence in our nation that I wrote for the Asheville Citizen-Times late in 1999 that seems unfortunately appropriate for these times.            [...]

Last evening Shonnie, Gracelyn and I were in the kitchen cooking dinner and listening to This Land is Your Land: Songs of Freedom. Buffy Sainte-Marie and her rendition of “The Universal [...]

My great-grandmother, Mae McCarthy (better known as Ma), who enjoyed dipping snuff and preferred another layer of body powder to regular bathing, had a Victorian attitude when it came to [...]

It was, in the end, about a 21st century governor who joined a short, tragic list of 20th century governors. You know at least some of these names, probably: Wallace, Faubus, Barnett. They were [...]

What do guys really want? Male stereotypes might have you believe that joining our pals for binge watching NCAA basketball tourney games while consuming lots of cold beer and hot pizza fulfill [...]

Below is my recent letter to the Asheville Citizen-Times backing Jasmine Beach-Ferrara for Buncombe County Commission. BACKING BEACH-FERRARA FOR SEAT ON COMMISSION When Amendment One passed in [...]

What will you release? And what will you begin?

“Don’t trust anyone over thirty,” I arrogantly proclaimed during the Sixties, when I was twenty-something and imagined I was bulletproof and would remain forever young. [...]

I’ve been curious for a while about the prevalence of storage unit facilities in the U.S. and whether this phenomena exists in other nations. So, here are the facts: The United States has [...]

Below is an op-ed I wrote in 2001 in my role as a columnist for the Asheville Citizen-Times. In light of recent decisions by the Boy Scouts of America, it seems timely to repost it now. * * * [...]

Since the U.S. Supreme Court struck down a key part of the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act in 2013, it was clear that marriage equality was on its way throughout our land. It really wasn’t a matter [...]

it’s 3:23 in the morning and I’m awake because my great great grandchildren won’t let me sleep my great great grandchildren ask me in dreams what did you do while the planet was plundered? what [...]

What we’ve been witnessing at the General Assembly in Raleigh the past few months is the futile attempt by fearful, old, white men to hang on to the power and control to which they assume they’re [...]

By the luck of the draw, in 1943, I was born white, male, heterosexual and middle class. I was instantly granted cultural privileges and advantages that gave me a distinct leg up as I made my way [...]

We never cease to stand like curious children before the great mystery into which we are born. ~Albert Einstein Somewhere in the middle of your life, you meet an interesting new person. Yourself. [...]